Going through a divorce can be one of life’s most challenging transitions. If you are currently divorcing your spouse, you know all too well how, right from the get-go, your world felt upside down. The person you loved and thought you knew best might have shocked you by asking for a divorce, throwing you for a loop.
You might have found out your spouse had been lying to you about your family finances, cheating, or that they suffered from an addiction. Perhaps you were the one who wanted to end your marriage, yet somehow you failed to appreciate how anxiety-ridden the divorce process would be. It’s why you turned to meditation in the first place — to quiet your anxious thoughts and soothe your soul. Smart choice because incorporating a daily meditation practice can help ease the pain you feel, plus help you heal.
But if you’re finding out, like so many other people going through a divorce, that your current meditation practice is falling short of your expectations, there’s something else you can do. And that is to add Christ into your daily meditation practice to create a Christ-centered meditation. After my divorce, I did precisely this, and it changed my life forever. Take this journey with me, and I’ll explain how.
What is Christ-centered guided meditation?
Even if you haven’t been letting Christ into your life lately, or never have before, it’s always the right time to start, and a Christ-centered guided meditation practice is a perfect way to invite Him in. So what does a Christ-centered guided meditation practice mean in application? Well, first, you should understand what meditation is in a more broad sense, especially if you haven’t meditated before.
What is meditation?
You probably have friends or family who have told you they meditate daily. Meditation, in a more generalized way, describes a practice you schedule at a set time, in the same place (if possible) to ground yourself, calm your mind and become aware of your thoughts, feelings and sensations in that moment.
Some use meditation for improving physical, psychological or spiritual health. The practice of concentrating and focusing on healing the heart and our body, soul, and spirit can result in an overall improvement in wellbeing and self-love.
This last goal is crucial, especially because, as the Bible reminds us, our heart is at the center of everything we do: “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” (Proverbs 4:23). And it’s precisely why a Christ-centered meditation practice could help you elevate your current meditation rituals and propel your life.
What is Christ-centered meditation?
In contrast to a secular meditation practice, Christ-centered meditation invokes Christ’s teachings of peace, love, forgiveness, and non-judgment. We move our focus from ourselves into the higher power that lives within all of us, which is The Light of Christ. You see, Christ is life. He lives in our hearts, although we don’t always recognize Him or realize He is there.
When we engage in Christ-centered meditation, we acknowledge that Christ is in us and around us. We succumb to His power. In other words, we become one with Christ. And it’s out of this new relationship that we can strengthen our spirit and experience spirituality like we never have before. It can be particularly beneficial if our hearts and spirit are in tatters because of a divorce.
Benefits of Christ-centered meditation when going through a divorce
When I went through my divorce, I lost my way. I felt alone and separated from the world. All I wanted to do was to retreat from the people and pastimes I once loved, particularly traveling, since I no longer had a spouse to accompany me. Incorporating a Christ-centered meditation into my life when I was going through my divorce, a practice I continue today long after I finalized my divorce, has caused me never to feel like I’m alone again.
That’s because I’ve since developed an intimate relationship with God. Today, Christ is always in my heart and by my side even when I’m physically by myself. From that relationship, I receive the strength I need to continually move my life forward in positivity and light, instead of in the shadow of my divorce, which could’ve cast a shadow on every aspect of my existence had I let it. Thankfully, I didn’t, and my Christ-centered meditation gave me the support I longed for when I needed it the most. I want that for you.
Build a support group through Christ-centered guided meditation
While building a support group can be beneficial in the long term, I believe you need to turn inward and establish your connection to God first. You may find a teacher who can help guide you through the process of creating a Christ-centered meditation practice, but other than that, Christ and God can provide all the support you need.
That’s because the purpose of Christ-centered meditation is to get to know what’s inside of us, our true self, so to speak, and to build our spirit. It’s hard to do that with outside distractions.
Psychologically speaking, we each have a unique self, a “psyche.” Biblically, we know the self as our soul. Our mind, emotions, and will, also sometimes referred to as our desires, make up our self-soul. Most people feel driven by these three inner parts and live solely from the self, disconnected from the spirit.
Secular meditation or mindfulness practice aims to increase awareness of the body and the self. Awareness of the spirit is not the focus.
To have more spirituality, the Bible tells us it’s necessary to surrender our body and soul (secularly the self) to our spirit. This takes the spiritual journey one step further and to a much higher and more powerful level.
The Bible refers to this transmission of power in 1 Thessalonians 5:23: “And the God of peace Himself sanctify you wholly, and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, without blame, at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.” In layman’s terms, the verse explains how we live in a body, we have a soul, but we are a spirit. And, to connect our spirit to the God of peace, we must first invite The Spirit of Jesus Christ into our hearts.
So what does this all mean? The first support you need, especially following a trauma like a divorce, is the support of God. Once you have re-established your relationship with Jesus Christ through Christ-centered meditation, you can then look to join or build a support group with others.
What’s critical to understand is that the relationship you build with Christ will bring you everything you need. So that should be and remain your primary focus. Here is what Christ-centered meditation can do for you.
Christ-centered guided meditation helps you cultivate self-love
Cultivating a relationship with Jesus Christ the way I did when going through my divorce enabled me to find love within myself, which I often lacked during this challenging time. As I learned to love God first, I noticed an overall love inside me growing. I was very wounded and the healing I received from this practice was nothing less than a miracle.
As the love inside me continued to grow, I was able to pray for those around me. I started praying for my ex-husband even though he continued to hurt me. I experienced Christ working in me. I learned to be still with God and I found love, and then love flowed out to others.
“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is Love.” (1 John 4)
Christ-centered meditation leads to greater self-mastery
When we invite Christ’s Spirit into our hearts, His Spirit connects with our human spirit. In that interconnection, we start to have a relationship to a higher power and consciousness. It’s out of that consciousness that self-control, creativity and wisdom begin to grow and flow.
So if, as a result of your divorce, you’ve been having trouble focusing at your job, enjoying the hobbies you once loved, or whatever you’ve noticed is “off,” accepting Christ into your heart will cause the fog to lift. You will know when it happens, too, because, seemingly all of a sudden, you will have a burst of creativity you didn’t know previously or haven’t seen in a long, long while. That’s a gift from God.
Christ-centered guided meditation improves your physical and emotional health
Feeling alone in the world can have all kinds of adverse effects on your emotional health, which, in turn, can affect your physical health. Fortunately, Christ-centered guided meditation can improve both. Having a relationship with Christ can feed our soul in a very literal sense; by bringing Christ into our life, His light brings newness in the way of thoughts, people, and, of course, love.
Without Him, we don’t have much room for anything else. Our soul is a complicated, sometimes dark place, composed of our minds, emotions, and desires. Experiences are stored in our soul since the time we were born. All of that “old” stuff can weigh us down. When we open ourselves to Christ, He heals us, body and soul.
Christian-guided meditation helps you get clarity
Through Christian-guided meditation, the healing we receive results in clarity. When we don’t have the pain in our life to distract us, we become free to bask in God’s Light. The Light of Christ illuminates everything inside us, including what’s harmful and weighing us down. We can see the light and the darkness in ourselves, which allows us to let go of all we no longer want in our lives, like past hurts, anger, and self-loathing.
With that gone, we have more room for love, compassion, and kindness. That is the space we hold in meditation. It’s a healing space, where Christ can co-exist as our healer.
Christ-centered guided meditation increases your compassion for yourself and others
To love another, you must first love yourself. When asked which commandment is most important, “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:30-31)
A Christ-centered meditation practice in which you first learn compassion towards your own pain leads to self-love. This self-love gives you the strength and understanding to love others knowing we all are suffering on some level. The message of Christ is to move out of being selfish into service for others. This cycle of giving love to others brings love and joy back to you. We give His compassion and love and it returns back to us.
Christian-guided meditation improves your spirituality
When you use Christian-guided meditation to put your faith and trust in Christ, leaning on Him for support, it improves your spirituality. In other words, Christ helps you build up your spirit, strengthening it at a time, like during a divorce, when you need to most.
Through Christian-centered guided meditation, you will feel more spiritual; you discover a power within yourself, which leads to a mastery of your thoughts, emotions, and actions, which in turn, improves your overall health and well being.
When you’re healthy and free from pain, you have more space in your heart for your spirit to flow and to create. You have the clarity and strength to project unconditional love onto everyone you meet. You become everything that Christ is, His attributes become merged with your spirit. You become a mirror of Him, radiating outward.
Christ-centered meditations when going through a divorce
Because divorce can be a particularly trying time in your life, I offer you the following Christ-centered meditations to include in your daily practice. You need not use all of them every time you meditate with Christ, only the ones you believe will lift you while meditating with Him in your mind and heart.
Christ-centered forgiveness meditation
Forgiveness is the gift we give ourselves. If you are looking to let go and be set free, forgive those you’re angry with — an ex, family, friends, a co-worker, whomever. Then forgive yourself for any regrets you may have or mistakes you made in the past, especially during your divorce. Repeat daily, “I forgive myself,” “I am forgiven.” ”Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)
Christ-centered self-care meditation
Part of showing yourself love is exercising self-care. Especially during a divorce, you may find you’re not eating enough, overeating, indulging in unhealthy food and drinks, and not getting enough sleep. Listen to God’s words during your next Christ-centered meditation about how you should care for yourself more: “Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you?” (1 Corinthians 3:16) Repeat daily, “The Kingdom of God is inside of me,” “God helps me.” Take that bath, prepare a wholesome, healthy meal, and go to sleep early.
Christ-centered peace meditation
Take part in a Christ-centered peace meditation by giving yourself permission to rest. And by rest, I mean letting go of the oppressive thoughts, the anger, and the fear you have for your future. Surrender your soul to God’s Spirit so He can lead you to your next chapter after divorce.
Breathe in P-E-A-C-E exhale, P-E-A-C-E.
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” (John 14:27)
Christ-centered identity meditation
With a Christ-centered identity meditation, you will see how God created you in His image. You are part human and part divine. You are supernatural. What you allow yourself to see in Him, you can then see in yourself. The virtues of God are patience, kindness, goodness, love, joy, peace, self-control and faithfulness. You are these as well.
”And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.” (2 Corinthians 3:18)
Repeat, “I am joined to the Lord, He is transforming me.”
Never forget the love Jesus Christ has for you. Surrendering daily to Him using a Christ-centered meditation practice will help you through your divorce. He takes care of you and all the rest. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11) All you have to do is open your heart to Christ.
Tonyah Dee has studied the Bible and wisdom traditions of the world for the last 30 years and teaches about finding ways to increase inner strength, stability, and confidence through practicing spiritual disciplines and healthy habits daily. Tonyah is a nutritionist, registered dietitian (R.D.), and earned her B.S. from Loma Linda University. She also holds certifications in Christ-centered life coaching, equine therapy, and meditation. Tonyah has been published in Scary Mommy, MSN, The Mighty, Mantra Wellness, CoveyClub, Thrive Global. Follow Tonyah on her blog, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, LinkedIn, and Medium.